What I Learned Twirling on the Pole

First of all, I want to start off by saying that I learned there are two types of women in this world: the ones that are meant to be sexy and the ones that are meant to be cute.

I learned, that I am not meant to be sexy.

Like, at all.

I am meant to be cute.

Much frustration and some denial later, I have accepted this fact.

Because when it comes to booty twerking, spinning upside down, letting my hair flip as I curve my pancake ass up off the ground in some unnatural position, I am no good.

I am actually quite terrible.

Why was I pole dancing?

To clear things up, I wasn’t dancing for money or stripping to some Nelly song (and definitely not “Hot in Herre”). My clothes stayed on, and there were no flying dollar bills, (not that anyone would actually want to tip a stick figure with the grace of a discombobulated deer).

I was taking a sexy fitness class to celebrate a girlfriend’s birthday. Not surprisingly, my friends were highly talented. I, on the other hand, came out with six bruises total and a bit of lowered self-esteem.

However, the most important thing I learned in my hour as “Curly Twirly” (my stripper name if I need an emergency career change), is that pole dancers are athletes and artists.

The strength it requires to hoist yourself up, stop movement on mid pole, and spin yourself, is incredible.

Why is this such a big deal?

These women don’t get nearly as much respect as they deserve. In fact, often, they get more disrespect than anything.

They are incredible athletes, with incredible strength, and amazing artists with even more amazing imaginations. Most importantly, they are comfortable with sexuality and that is more than we can say for most people on this earth, especially more than men.

Now, I had already kind of known this before the class, but now I am certain. I think that pole dancing as a sport can be highly confidence boosting and build some killer abs.

Would I do this again? No, because, like any other sport on this earth, I suck.

But hey, I encourage you to give a try. You might pleasantly surprised.

Stay gold,


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